Taking It In Stride..
First, let me start by saying that the Holy Spirit IS PRESENT. One person can not fathom the love, support, prayer, faith and devotion all of you have shown. I am overwhelmed by the response we have gotten from all of you and could not be more thankful. So THANK YOU. I know God is hearing your prayers and it means the absolute world to me.
For a lot of you wondering, we have explored our options. We discussed transferring to hospitals around the country. We discussed being admitted now instead of waiting until the 23 week mark. We considered all of the Level 4 NICUS. We made the decision that was right for us. The team I have behind me at Sacred Heart supports me. Like I've said before, I am SO LUCKY to personally know three of the OB's at Sacred Heart. Not only do I know them, I respect them and I am SO grateful for them. I know if I transferred to a bigger hospital I would just be another patient. To these three amazing doctors I feel I am not just another chart. They have made it clear through the constant monitoring that they have my best interest at heart. They are probably tired of all of my texts, but they are still answering! We have made Plan A's, Plan B's etc. Our decision was to stay local. To stay close to my daughter. To stay close to my family, to my support group. To stay in the care of these doctors that I know. No hospital in the country is going to do a thing for me but monitor me until 22-24 weeks so at home I will stay watching my daughter play until something changes.
Friday, September 13th
We were discharged from the hospital on Friday night around 11:30pm. That was after receiving 48 hours of IV antibiotics and constant monitoring of my vitals and the babies' heartbeats. All of my vitals stayed stable (not showing any sign of infection, YAY!) and the babies heartbeats stayed around the 150's-160's. I was sent home to start an oral regiment of antibiotics for 5 days. Was told to take it easy and stay on modified bedrest. Since I've been home, my vitals have been stable and I monitor the babies heartbeats three times a day and it is always a blessing to hear them beating away!
Monday, September 16th
Today was our first appointment with our High Risk Doctor in Pensacola. I was terrified the whole way there but so ready to talk to the doctor. I knew today they were doing an anatomy scan so I would be able to at least make sure everything was in tact and in the right place. Today, I went in with the thought that he was going to tell me, it's going to be a long road, but if you don't get an infection, we can do this. I was planning on being admitted at 23 weeks. I was planning on him telling me that outside of the rupture, the babies' looked great. I was wrong.
Baby B, whose sac ruptured, has always measured smaller than Baby A. Since my first ultrasound at 6 weeks, he's been smaller and at every ultrasound since. When I say small, I mean he's in the 4th Percentile while his brother is in the 99th. Outside of his size, he had no noticeable differences until his sac ruptured.
Well, today, we found out that he has a Two Vessel Umbilical Cord. Which means instead of his cord having two arteries delivering nutrients, he only has one. Not a huge deal typically, but something to monitor and can cause for smaller babies.
We also found out that his placenta is not working "well". His placenta is very large and there is some blood between it and the lining of my uterus and some old blood collections. That is another reason why he is so small. I didn't know what to make of learning this until the doctor said this could be a possibility for him not surviving. Let the mental breakdown begin. I didn't have a million questions at the time because my mind went blank and my heart went numb.
The worries of the rupture were almost thrown out the window. Just DO NOT GET AN INFECTION. Baby B's sac even had an adequate amount of amniotic fluid in it today! That, no longer is our main concern. Baby B's chance of survival is our top concern. Baby A is perfectly healthy and thriving! (that is music to my ears)
The thoughts of the future went from, what is hospital life from 23 weeks on look like to what if I have to make the most impossible decision a mother can ever make. To choose. To possibly have to choose between Baby Wright or Baby Brendan. I refuse to even go there now. I'm not prepared for that. My new focus is on praying that Baby Brendan starts thriving. That his placenta starts working correctly and that his sac repairs itself. These prayers are HUGE. It is rare that either of these things heal themselves. Positivity and faith is all I have.
At the end of this week or the beginning of next week I have an appointment with my regular OB (who God love him talked me off the ledge this afternoon after my appointment) to check on me and make sure no infection is looming. Next Friday, I have another appointment with my High Risk Doctor to check the blood flow between placenta and baby. I pray that the flow is good and that the right amount of nutrients are getting to him! After next Friday, we will know more. We will have more of a plan. We will know what kind of decisions we will have to make. So until then, we keep praying. We keep giving this to God. We keep telling negativity to hit the road and loving on these babies the best we can. We survive. All of us.
Some positive takeaways in the midst of the negativity. Baby B is still growing! He hasn't stopped growing. He's always been small but he's never stopped growing. His amniotic fluid level today was "normal" over 2cm! His heart rate is great. He doesn't have any physical abnormalities. He has all of his parts and outside of his placenta and two vessel cord it all seems to be functioning. Baby A is perfectly healthy. More than healthy, he is thriving! I don't have an infection. My body is still taking care of these babies the best it can and amniotic fluid is still being produced. I have the most AMAZING group of prayer warriors behind me. The support has been overwhelming and unwavering. I have the support of so many doctors and nurses. I have my health and my families' health. I have a little redhead that is the center of my world. I have life. I have hope. Most of all, I have faith.
So for the next 11 days I take it easy. I monitor my babies heart rates. I take my temperature and finish out my meds. I do everything I can to prevent an infection. I nourish my body to nourish my babies. I consult with doctors. I cry with friends. I live and I pray, because for now, that's all I know to do.
For a lot of you wondering, we have explored our options. We discussed transferring to hospitals around the country. We discussed being admitted now instead of waiting until the 23 week mark. We considered all of the Level 4 NICUS. We made the decision that was right for us. The team I have behind me at Sacred Heart supports me. Like I've said before, I am SO LUCKY to personally know three of the OB's at Sacred Heart. Not only do I know them, I respect them and I am SO grateful for them. I know if I transferred to a bigger hospital I would just be another patient. To these three amazing doctors I feel I am not just another chart. They have made it clear through the constant monitoring that they have my best interest at heart. They are probably tired of all of my texts, but they are still answering! We have made Plan A's, Plan B's etc. Our decision was to stay local. To stay close to my daughter. To stay close to my family, to my support group. To stay in the care of these doctors that I know. No hospital in the country is going to do a thing for me but monitor me until 22-24 weeks so at home I will stay watching my daughter play until something changes.
Friday, September 13th
We were discharged from the hospital on Friday night around 11:30pm. That was after receiving 48 hours of IV antibiotics and constant monitoring of my vitals and the babies' heartbeats. All of my vitals stayed stable (not showing any sign of infection, YAY!) and the babies heartbeats stayed around the 150's-160's. I was sent home to start an oral regiment of antibiotics for 5 days. Was told to take it easy and stay on modified bedrest. Since I've been home, my vitals have been stable and I monitor the babies heartbeats three times a day and it is always a blessing to hear them beating away!
Monday, September 16th
Today was our first appointment with our High Risk Doctor in Pensacola. I was terrified the whole way there but so ready to talk to the doctor. I knew today they were doing an anatomy scan so I would be able to at least make sure everything was in tact and in the right place. Today, I went in with the thought that he was going to tell me, it's going to be a long road, but if you don't get an infection, we can do this. I was planning on being admitted at 23 weeks. I was planning on him telling me that outside of the rupture, the babies' looked great. I was wrong.
Baby B, whose sac ruptured, has always measured smaller than Baby A. Since my first ultrasound at 6 weeks, he's been smaller and at every ultrasound since. When I say small, I mean he's in the 4th Percentile while his brother is in the 99th. Outside of his size, he had no noticeable differences until his sac ruptured.
Well, today, we found out that he has a Two Vessel Umbilical Cord. Which means instead of his cord having two arteries delivering nutrients, he only has one. Not a huge deal typically, but something to monitor and can cause for smaller babies.
We also found out that his placenta is not working "well". His placenta is very large and there is some blood between it and the lining of my uterus and some old blood collections. That is another reason why he is so small. I didn't know what to make of learning this until the doctor said this could be a possibility for him not surviving. Let the mental breakdown begin. I didn't have a million questions at the time because my mind went blank and my heart went numb.
The worries of the rupture were almost thrown out the window. Just DO NOT GET AN INFECTION. Baby B's sac even had an adequate amount of amniotic fluid in it today! That, no longer is our main concern. Baby B's chance of survival is our top concern. Baby A is perfectly healthy and thriving! (that is music to my ears)
The thoughts of the future went from, what is hospital life from 23 weeks on look like to what if I have to make the most impossible decision a mother can ever make. To choose. To possibly have to choose between Baby Wright or Baby Brendan. I refuse to even go there now. I'm not prepared for that. My new focus is on praying that Baby Brendan starts thriving. That his placenta starts working correctly and that his sac repairs itself. These prayers are HUGE. It is rare that either of these things heal themselves. Positivity and faith is all I have.
At the end of this week or the beginning of next week I have an appointment with my regular OB (who God love him talked me off the ledge this afternoon after my appointment) to check on me and make sure no infection is looming. Next Friday, I have another appointment with my High Risk Doctor to check the blood flow between placenta and baby. I pray that the flow is good and that the right amount of nutrients are getting to him! After next Friday, we will know more. We will have more of a plan. We will know what kind of decisions we will have to make. So until then, we keep praying. We keep giving this to God. We keep telling negativity to hit the road and loving on these babies the best we can. We survive. All of us.
Some positive takeaways in the midst of the negativity. Baby B is still growing! He hasn't stopped growing. He's always been small but he's never stopped growing. His amniotic fluid level today was "normal" over 2cm! His heart rate is great. He doesn't have any physical abnormalities. He has all of his parts and outside of his placenta and two vessel cord it all seems to be functioning. Baby A is perfectly healthy. More than healthy, he is thriving! I don't have an infection. My body is still taking care of these babies the best it can and amniotic fluid is still being produced. I have the most AMAZING group of prayer warriors behind me. The support has been overwhelming and unwavering. I have the support of so many doctors and nurses. I have my health and my families' health. I have a little redhead that is the center of my world. I have life. I have hope. Most of all, I have faith.
So for the next 11 days I take it easy. I monitor my babies heart rates. I take my temperature and finish out my meds. I do everything I can to prevent an infection. I nourish my body to nourish my babies. I consult with doctors. I cry with friends. I live and I pray, because for now, that's all I know to do.
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